Concerned dad

1 reply [Last post]
Joined: 12/02/2014

Hello, I am new to this site. Some things i have noticed in my childs behavior over recent months has had me baffled and worried, she has become very distant and doesnt enjoy comming to my place anymore, always seems to have some excuse not to come. I have had some councelling to try and see if i was doing something wrong, as my ex partner and her family were telling me it was my fault. After one councelling session my councellor said to me "Have you heard of Parental alienation" i told him no. After doing a lot of reserch a whole lot of stuff is now making sense. I carefully expressed my concerns to my ex and her family, and asked if they would attend a councelling session with me, only to be hit with a barrage of opposition, being told its all my fault, im the one who needs councelling, everything is all good with my ex partner and she doesnt need councelling. This has only strenghtened my suspicions, but am now at a loss as to what to do. is it normal for grand parents to be knowingly or unaware be working with the mother to alienate the father. I feel like its a lose lose situation for me. Am keeping diary that I can give my daughter when she is older and hopefully comes to me and says what happened dad, where were you all these years.

Maureen Dupreez
Joined: 05/01/2014
Dear James, My heart goes out

Dear James,

My heart goes out to you as my husband is in the same situation. His ex wife has brainwashed the children, especially the little girl to such an extend that she does not want to come to our house.

She was here one Sunday afternoon and when my husband took them back home, she told him that it was fun being here and with him. But sadly the next weekend she did not want to come.

I feel so sorry for all the parents (mothers and fathers) who are so heart broken because of exes not knowing what they are doing to their own children.

My husband is also keeping a diary and one day he will show it to his children. The boy stayed the whole of last weekend and I could see that he was happy.

I do not want to say anyting on this forum that can hurt the children even more as this is an open forum and she might just sign onto it.

I love this two children dearly as if they were my own and I miss them. When we were still in South Africa they used to come and stay with us over weekends and school holidays but since they also moved to Australia it is as if they are acting in a way to say that this never happened.

I am sad to see that children are used as objects to hurt their dad. He is such a caring and loving person. My children's dad passed away before me and my husband got married and he loves my children the same way I love his.

They are all our children if only we can spend more time with them and I know they love my children too. Whenever they came to visit us back at home and the 2 times in WA they would ask where my son is, they missed him. They spend time with my daughter and people who do not know us think they are boilogical sibblings.

So now I ask the question, how can a mother say she loves her children if she cannot see the love they have for others. And how can she say she loves them if she do not want to allow them to grow the love they have for their father.

I love you J and K and I miss you.

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